


Dress to Impress

by Agent0fChaos (wir_sind_die_Jager)



Series: Holy One-Shots, Batman! [6]
Category: Batman (Movies - Nolan)
Genre: Drabble, Ficlet, Gen, Inner Dialogue, Nolanverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-25
Updated: 2019-06-25
Packaged: 2020-05-19 10:01:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19354732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wir_sind_die_Jager/pseuds/Agent0fChaos
Summary: The Joker's inner monologue one particular night.





	Dress to Impress

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for the batfic_community on Livejournal back in January of 2009. The theme was "resolution" and I won 3rd place for it. I've been slowly but surely moving all of my Batfic over to AO3 and giving them a bit of a sprucing up. Please enjoy.

_Day 336._

_Getting close now. Soon it'll be our anniversary. What's the first year? Paper. Hm. Money? Yes, you could use a little money, but what good would it do you now? None at all. Money would only drive us apart. You would close right up and transform so irrevocably, I'd never recognize you. Money isn't going to change anything. You should be happy with who you are. I know I am. I'm always happy, thanks to you. You put a smile on my face. A permanent, gruesome grin. Thanks for that._   
  
_But what to do for you? I want to take you out on the town and show you off. Oh, I know we had our rough patch in the beginning...I wasn't too keen about you tagging along everywhere I went, but you grew on me, so to speak. Yes, indeedy, I find myself rather attached to you now and I cannot imagine my life without you. So we ought to do something special. Let's look in the paper and see if we can't find something that really grabs out attention._   
  
_Hmm...two for one waffle cones at Dairy Queen. Tempting, but eating ice cream when the weather's cold always makes me phlegmy. So we'll put that in the maybe pile. Bowling? I'm rather keen on the shoes but I don't think you'd have any fun. Well, hello, what's this?_

**Mysterious Bat Man spotted near suspicious fire in Narrows apartment building.**  

_Bat? Man? What in the name of the seven glorious hell is a Bat. Man? Well, my love, I think we have found something rather extraordinary here.  
_  
 _Just where would we find this Bat Man, I wonder? Do you think he has a signal of some sort? Maybe he doesn't want to play with us. This article doesn't seem to know if he is one of us or one of them. Let's get ourselves all gussied up and go find out what we can about this Bat Man, shall we? Oh, but we have to decide what to wear. That is always the problem, isn't it? We're such slaves to fashion, always having to match now._  
  
 _Tonight is your night. You need to be fearsome and striking. I want you to be the star of your own little show. Sure, I've got the talent, but you've got the **Presence** and that counts for something. You have the ability to walk into a room and turn heads. Make heads roll. Hee. Hee. Yes. No more keeping you locked up, wrapped up, and bundled away from the public. It's time to dress you up and show you off. Where to start, where to start? Ouch! Damn, that smarts. I should know by now that when I punch a mirror it's going to hurt. Hey. Would you look at that? Red. Such a transformative color. It has so many meanings: luck, life, passion, hot, stop, fire, danger, love, hate, anger. Mesmerizing. Don't you think? _  
  
 _So many meanings but it never fails to make an entrance. Always able to draw attention to itself, make everything brighter, bolder,_ **bloodier**! Let's just see what you look like covered in red, hm? 

_Oh, yes, that's quite nice._

_I think we've found your color._

**Author's Note:**

> tl;dr: it is about his scars.


End file.
